Encouragement for the Worn-Out Mommas

It blows my mind to tell people my babies are nine and seven years old.  Back when they were infants I would meet people with fourth-graders and think, “I’m glad that’s so far away, I am SO not ready for that!”  Of course, I wasn’t ready then.  But as time has raced on God has made me prepared.  Parenting has taught me that—believe it or not--you’ll be ready when the time comes!  Even though I’m in a completely different stage of parenting, I often think about those hard early days.  The days when I had multiple babies in diapers and the “body spills” were plentiful.  The days when my back and wrists and hips were all strained with the constant lifting of quickly-growing bodies.  The days when sleeping well was an unattainable dream, and even my dreams featured little cries of “mommy!” that would wake me up in the night.  Those days, momma, are hard.

Why then do older moms so frequently counsel you young mommas to appreciate each moment, to not wish it away, and to watch out or it’ll just fly by?  I guess all those nuggets of wisdom are true.  It does go fast (even faster when you’re looking back at it!) and taking a moment to appreciate it may indeed be helpful.

I want to give you young mommas in the trenches a slightly different word on this.  This season of young children is a precious time, but it is also a difficult, back-breaking, exhausting time.  I am sorry that it has to be so hard for you.  I remember, and I feel your pain.  But the encouragement is this: it is so, so worth it. 

Everything you are doing now: all the bottoms cleaned, all the feedings, all the re-reading the same board book; all the lifting into shopping carts and breaking elbows with heavy car seats, all the sobbing and tantrums and sleep-training: it is all worth it.  Because every single act of love that you pour into them now is building the foundation for who those little people will become. 

You’re in the business of making people.  It’s the hardest and most important work of your life.

Yes, I do miss what my kids were like as babies.  I miss their fat little rolls and baby giggles and the sweet snuggles.  I miss their innocence and even the silliest of the tantrums.  But I also love the people my children are becoming.  I love that they can brush their own teeth and clean their own rooms (thought usually not without a fight).  I love that they are sensitive to the needs of others, full of imagination and creativity and intellect and love.  These are things you don’t see in your babies, but you are nurturing all these things even in the youngest children.

And, after all, it is a season.  However impossible it seems now, you will look up one day and realize with amazement that you have a fourth-grader.  You’ve moved through those trying, early years and you are seeing ever more clearly why you persevered.  So keep your chin up, Momma!  I’ll see you on the other side.  We can get together and tell all the young moms just how fast it goes.

Sock Treasures (A Guest Post from Joy Reclaimed)

I have a treat for you! I'm welcoming Laura as a guest to the blog today.  This special lady is a new friend of mine but was once my hubby's Sunday School teacher!  Laura is also a mom who is currently raising her five-year-old grandson.  She recently started a blog, Joy Reclaimed...would you please take a moment to check her out there as well?  Here's just a taste of what she has to offer:

Bedtime at our house is filled with typical five year old antics–stalling, more time in the bathtub negotiations, tooth brushing, water drinking and the ritual of choosing the toy of honor that gets to share the bed for the night.  “No, you can’t sleep with that one, you’ll roll over on it in the middle of the night and wake up!” Then a story, bedtime prayers and lights out.

These are normal activities for households with small children, except that we were supposed to be empty nesters.

Last night, I was helping Zachary get ready for bed when he warned me as I reached for his foot to remove his sock.  “There’s art supplies in there!”  In his sock?  Since school?  Sure enough, carefully peeling his sock off his foot revealed seven  brightly colored broken pencil leads that he had collected and placed there for safe keeping during craft time at school.  I asked the obvious questions.  “Why did you save these?” and “Why did you put them in your sock?”  And I got the obvious answers.  “Because I liked them.”  and “Because I didn’t have a pocket!”  Oh.

Against my looks-like-trash-to-me-so toss-it instincts, each tiny colored piece was carefully placed in a dixie cup and several seconds were spent marveling over how pretty each was in the bottom of the cup.  “I like the red one best!”  And then after prayers and kisses; a moment to double check that the small cup with the treasures inside was safe until morning.

I am blessed to again be able to experience the joy of ordinary moments. The ones that really matter. Once again, I get to see the world through a child’s eyes.  Coming from a place of understanding I couldn’t possibly have known as a young parent, I am amazed by how much of what is really important I missed the first time around and am determined to make the best of this second chance.

The road to last night’s bedtime ritual was paved with the stones of poor choices; resulting in bumps, delays, detours, potholes and heart breaking consequences. But it led to a beautiful place of joy I would never have found any other way.

(Isn't this a great reminder for all us moms?  Again, please take a moment to check her out at Joy Reclaimed, and thank you!)

5 Strategies for Summer Survival

Friday is the last day of school for the boys and MAN am I ready!!!  I am so sick of packing lunch and unpacking piles of paper that the prospect of even one more week makes me want to go into a fetal position.  The person who starts a business packing school lunches is gonna be a bazillionaire. Spoiler alert: it won't be me.

I'm so looking forward to lazy days of playing in the pool and wondering aloud at like 2:30, "hey did I feed you lunch yet?  Or even breakfast?"  But of course there is a certain amount of dread when it comes to changing schedules and tons of togetherness, too.  All that time can be intimidating, so today I wanted to share my top strategies for summer survival.

1. Run Your Own Summer Camp

I mean, just for your kids.  Or even invite friends over, what the heck.  This was my top method for summer survival when the kids were small.  I'd choose a different theme each week and organize our activities around it.

The cover of my Summer Camp Binder

Working with a theme was super fun for the boys and really helped keep me motivated and organized. Some examples of themes: Our Country, Water Week, Camping, Pirates, Speed Week (race cars), Farming, you get the idea.

Here's a peek inside--it was very handy to get organized like this!

For tips to get you started, read more here and here.

2. Create (at least some) Structure

Going from a very structured routine to none at all is hard on everyone.  I like to have a general idea of how our days will go and share it with the children.  Especially if you have young children it is helpful to make the routine visible, even if you just list your daily activities on a chalkboard or whiteboard. If your kids are older, you could simply write out a weekly routine and create daily expectations for things they will do.  I made laminated Summer Checklist for my kids. They have to check off every category before they get screen time.

Want to print out your own Summer Checklist for free?  Click on the picture or right here.

3. Make a Summer Bucket List

This summer will be the first that I am using a "bucket list" to motivate and inspire us.  I am making my own filled with specific activities we have locally and things my kids have requested (having a pie fight in the driveway, for example).  But there are tons our there you can use to get you started, too.  I really like the free printables at Yellow Bliss Road and the kids' version at The Teacher Bag (requires signing up with your email).

4. Make Time for Yourself

Look, we all love our little darlings but we also all need time to scream into a pillow, um, hear ourselves think, see to our own needs.  The reason I didn't blog at all last week was because I took some preemptive time for myself in expectation of not having much this summer.  My plan for this summer is to make sure I hit the gym twice a week while my generous mother entertains the boys.  Another option is to hire a mother's helper, which is wonderful even if you don't leave the house.  But if you don't have the budget for that, don't fret!  There are still ways to carve out time for yourself!

An absolute must for me is Quiet Time. We've had Quiet Time in our house ever since Biggest stopped napping, and this summer will be no different.  Everyone retreating to their own space for an hour of reading or quiet play is a life saver.  I will start off our summer with Quiet Time built right in, it will just be part of our daily routine. If your babies are young and have trouble playing on their own, my advice is to gently and firmly enforce your expectation, escorting them right back to their rooms if they interrupt your time.  Having a few of their favorite activities available during that time helps, as does giving them a specified time limit (set a timer for little ones who can't read time yet).  A few tears and tantrums during the transition are worth the sanity-saving effect of Quiet Time and the lessons for them on how to entertain oneself.

Oh! Also, if you have an Ikea near you you can score an hour of free supervised child care for anybody who is potty trained while you shop!  If you don't have an Ikea near you, maybe it's worth the road trip?

5. Have Fun!

In summers past I have been known to start fretting about all the learning that's bein' wasted.  Brain cells deteriorating in the hot sun, handwriting reduced to a scrawl and number sense disappearing.  I've broken out workbooks and math games.  And the really thoughtful, responsible part of me thinks those are legitimate concerns and maybe we will do some math worksheets this summer.  But, if not, that's okay too because my fun-loving side has already declared 2016 as the ULTIMATE SUMMER OF FUN.  And obviously that's not something my kids will forget.  They've taken it as a formal contract and I am sure when we aren't having fun I will be reminded.

My Baby Who is Now Nine Years Old

My baby turned 9 years old in January and I guess I'm feeling like the years are slipping by.  I want to enjoy these little people while they still enjoy hanging out with me.  So we are going to be flinging water balloons and whipped cream at each other, slipping on plastic sheets in the backyard, staying up late to watch fireflies, and eating LOTS of popsicles.  We are going to have fun, darn it, even me.  And whenever I get cranky with the constant bickering I am going to try and remember that my summers with my boys are limited.  I plan on enjoying every minute.

So what about you?  What are your top strategies for summer survival?

When Losing Your Voice Isn't So Bad

I lost my voice four days ago and I am starting to wonder: will it ever come back?  No, not my literary voice; it's my actual voice that's shot.  I can speak just above a whisper in the early part of the day, but by dinner I'm back to almost near silence.  It's not been easy but it has made me think about my words in a new way.

via GIPHY

(If you're reading on email, click through to the blog for the full effect!)

Here's a few things I am learning from this experience:

I Talk Too Much About Everything
Man, I really am a talker.  I like to tell everyone how my boys are a "wall of sound" who "never stop with the jibber-jabber," and while that is true, I can't deny that it's definitely more peaceful around here without my chatter added to the mix.  With speech now such a huge effort, I have become much more selective about what I say and that has me realizing that the vast majority of what I say just doesn't have a point.  It's like my mouth is just a release valve for my overactive brain.  But I don't want to waste anyone's time just spewing stream-of-consciousness.  Besides, being selective about what I say makes me want to be more selective about what I think.

Fewer Words Make a Bigger Impression
Every time I speak over these last few days, I have tried to get my point across in as few words as possible.  It turns out, the same editing process I use when writing is helpful when speaking.  Helpful hint from Captain Obvious: this is also known as "thinking before you speak."  I feel like I am getting my point across to my people with (almost) zero nagging.  Maybe its partly that everyone feels sorry for me, but the kids are doing things after one request.  I can't help but think that my simple, pointed statements are making it easier for the children to focus on what needs doing.

Speaking Softly Makes People Listen
One of my pet peeves is my people yelling throughout the house to get each others' attention.  Yet, when dinner's ready or its time for school, that is exactly what I do!  With no ability to yell I am realizing that I am the worst offender on my own pet peeve!  But speaking softly demands the attention of your listener.  This morning I read a story to the boys over breakfast, just as I do every morning.  Except this morning I was speaking in a whisper.  Rather than the usual spinning around in chairs, or roaming around the kitchen for a napkin/refill/spoon/yogurt, the boys sat quietly and paid full attention to every word.  They had to, or they would miss it.  I'm definitely pulling out this trick when I need full attention in the future.

Plus I Can Hear Better Too
It's easier to be a compassionate, active listener when you already know there's literally nothing you can say in return.

I guess silence really is golden!  I'm still hoping for my voice to return soon but hopefully I'll hang on to these lessons even after it does.  Turning off the release valve, editing my speech, speaking quietly and just listening may just become my best go-to tricks in communicating with my people.  

Mommy Summer Camp: Water Week!

Last week was Water Week for Mommy Summer Camp, and once again, the theme was chosen based on existing plans.  A while back we purchased a Living Social deal for Great Wolf Lodge, so we spent two days there last week.  It was So. Much. Fun.

Waaaay more fun than our first trip, when the boys were only 3 and 5 years old.  We went on all the rides a bunch of times, and the boys spent hours in that wave pool.

Also for water week, we went to the regular pool for the first time, which was awesome.  And I made this little snack:

You may have seen variations of it on Pinterest.  I didn't get super fancy, just waited a little over an hour before sticking some Swedish Fish into my blue jello.  They weren't perfect, but I actually like that the tops look a little splashy.

If I'd had more time, here are some other fun ideas I might have tried last week:

Photo: Homemade Toast

Photo: No Time for Flashcards

Photo: Spoonful

This week the boys have an actual camp, so I am taking it easy!  Have fun with your kids this week!

Digging for Treasure

We went strawberry pickin' on Saturday morning.  (There's no other way to say it--it's "pickin," never "picking.")

This is a family tradition for us, which I love because it is active, outdoor work which teaches the kids about farming and rewards us with healthy, delicious fruit.  Love that!  We've been in all kinds of weather, but this year was perfection.  Sunny, with a cool breeze.

Pickin' strawberries is addictive, maybe because it's like digging for treasure.  You just keep thinking, what's under the next leaf?

And the strawberries are like treasure--like rubies--literally glistening in the sun.  We all love it!  We should get jobs in the fields, I tell you!

We got two gallons this year, which means I have to freeze most of them.  I like to wash, dry and stem them right away (I don't even bother with hulling).

I then lay them out in a single layer on wax paper-lined cookie sheets, freeze them for a couple of hours, then switch them into a freezer bag.  Doing it this way helps them stay separated, so we can pull out as many as we need each time.

Saturday evening, we had fresh strawberry ice cream, which went so fast I never even got a picture! Welcome to Summer everyone!

Teaching Kids about Money (and a Cute Craft to Help!)

For quite some time now, Biggest has been really into "saving up."  He decides on (what else?) a Lego set, and then saves every scrap of money that comes his way until he has enough.  It's been a great exercise in hard work, patience, and handling money.  However, I've wanted a system to make it easy for him to save and tithe--rather than doing these things haphazardly, or in a bank account he can't see.

Fortunately, my dear friend Blair motivated me and asked me to make money jars for her girls, and then I just got on a roll.

This is just so easy.  Blair saw something similar online, but we adapted our design to our needs, and used my Silhouette to make paper and twine tags for each set of jars.  You can easily do this without a Silhouette, using craft-store tags and stickers, or even have your child help make the tags.

The idea, of course, is that all money gets separated in the 10-10-80 method: 10% to savings, 10% to giving, and 80% for spending.  This way, even a young child can watch his "bank account" get bigger (until we take that cash to the actual bank for deposit to his account); he can also take ownership over giving out of his jar.

For my boys, I made tags to match the colors in their rooms, and laminated them for durability.

For Blair's girls, we made adorable tags and didn't laminate them.  Obviously the design options here are limitless!

I was so excited when Biggest got really into splitting up his birthday money.  We practiced counting money, and had a great conversation about why we believe in setting aside money for tithing.  Then he insisted on going to his old piggy bank to split all that money up too!  Proud mama.  This is just a beginning, but is definitely helps to have a system in place, and it's even better when the system is cute!


P.S. Lovin' the Linky's at:






Milk and Cuddles

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy day of thanks, dear friends!

Our Gratitude Tree.

Love this time of year for the chance to give thanks for my blessings.  To see family.  To celebrate!

We have especially enjoyed making "leaves" for our tree this year.  Here are a few highlights:

One of mine.

The Hubs's first contribution.  Funny man.

Big Boy's.  He is grateful for his family.  I die from the cuteness.

Have a *wonderful* holiday!